Seasoning Our Words

Part 2: How to Say Hard Things

June 2, 2024

Cinnamon Sugar Quick Bread

Dry Ingredients:

• 2 cups flour
• 1 Tbsp baking powder
• ½ tsp salt
• 1 cup sugar (don't get those two confused!)

Wet ingredients:

• 1 egg beaten
• 1 cup milk
• ⅓ cup vegetable oil

Sugar layer:

• ⅓ cup sugar
• 2 tsp cinnamon

Instructions:

1. Mix the dry ingredients
2. Add wet ingredients
3. Pour half of the batter into a greased baking pan
4. Sprinkle sugar and cinnamon on top
5. Add the rest of the batter on top of that layer
6. Preheat oven to 350°
7. Bake for 45-50 minutes
8. Let it cool for 10 minutes
9. Enjoy!

"There was a wealthy man from Maon who owned property near the town of Carmel. . . . This man's name was Nabal, and his wife, Abigail, was a sensible and beautiful woman. But Nabal . . . . was crude and mean in all his dealings." (1 Samuel 25:2–3, New Living Translation)

When David heard that Nabal was shearing his sheep, he sent ten of his young men to Carmel with this message for Nabal: "Peace and prosperity to you, your family, and everything you own! I am told that it is sheep-shearing time. While your shepherds stayed among us near Carmel, we never harmed them, and nothing was ever stolen from them. Ask your own men, and they will tell you this is true. So would you be kind to us, since we have come at a time of celebration? Please share any provisions you might have on hand with us and with your friend David." (1 Samuel 25:4-8, NLT)

"Who is this fellow David?" Nabal sneered to the young men. "Who does this son of Jesse think he is? There are lots of servants these days who run away from their masters. Should I take my bread and my water and my meat that I've slaughtered for my shearers and give it to a band of outlaws who come from who knows where?" (1 Samuel 25:10–11, NLT)

"A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare." (Proverbs 15:1, NLT)

So David's young men returned and told him what Nabal had said. "Get your swords!" was David's reply as he strapped on his own. Then 400 men started off with David, and 200 remained behind to guard their equipment." (1 Samuel 25:12–13, NLT)

Meanwhile, one of Nabal's servants went to Abigail and told her, "David sent messengers from the wilderness to greet our master, but he screamed insults at them. These men have been very good to us, and we never suffered any harm from them. Nothing was stolen from us the whole time they were with us. In fact, day and night they were like a wall of protection to us and the sheep. You need to know this and figure out what to do, for there is going to be trouble for our master and his whole family. He's so ill-tempered that no one can even talk to him!" (1 Samuel 25:14–17, NLT)

Recipe for persuasiveness in difficult conversations:

"Abigail wasted no time. She quickly gathered 200 loaves of bread, two wineskins full of wine, five sheep that had been slaughtered, nearly a bushel of roasted grain, 100 clusters of raisins, and 200 fig cakes. She packed them on donkeys." (1 Samuel 25:18, NLT)

1. Say it with food.

2. Start with humility.

"As she was riding her donkey into a mountain ravine, she saw David and his men coming toward her. . . . When Abigail saw David, she quickly got off her donkey and bowed low before him." (1 Samuel 25:20, 23, NLT)

"In humility consider others as more important than yourselves." (Philippians 2:3, Holman Christian Standard Bible)

"You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though He was God . . . . when he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal's death on a cross." (Philippians 2:5–8, NLT)

3. Take responsibility for your part.

"She fell at his feet and said, "I accept all blame in this matter, my lord. Please listen to what I have to say. I know Nabal is a wicked and ill-tempered man; please don't pay any attention to him. . . . But I never even saw the young men you sent." (1 Samuel 25:24-25, NLT)

"And here is a present that I, your servant, have brought to you and your young men. Please forgive me if I have offended you in any way." (1 Samuel 25:27-28, NLT)

4. Cast vision for their life.

"The LORD will surely reward you with a lasting dynasty, for you are fighting the LORD's battles. And you have not done wrong throughout your entire life. Even when you are chased by those who seek to kill you, your life is safe in the care of the LORD your God. . . . But the lives of your enemies will disappear like stones shot from a sling!" (1 Samuel 25:28-29, NLT)

5. Gently point out where they need to change.

"When the LORD has done all he promised and has made you leader of Israel, don't let this be a blemish on your record. Then your conscience won't have to bear the staggering burden of needless bloodshed and vengeance." (1 Samuel 25:30–31, NLT)

6. Leave the outcome to God.

"David replied to Abigail, "Praise the LORD, the God of Israel, who has sent you to meet me today! Thank God for your good sense! Bless you for keeping me from murder and from carrying out vengeance with my own hands." (1 Samuel 25:32-33, NLT)

"When Abigail arrived home, she found that Nabal was throwing a big party and was celebrating like a king. He was very drunk, so she didn't tell him anything about her meeting with David until dawn the next day. In the morning when Nabal was sober, his wife told him what had happened. As a result he had a stroke, and he lay paralyzed on his bed like a stone. About ten days later, the Lord struck him, and he died." (1 Samuel 25:36–38, NLT)

"When David heard that Nabal was dead, he said, "Praise the LORD, who has avenged the insult I received from Nabal and has kept me from doing it myself. Nabal has received the punishment for his sin." Then David sent messengers to Abigail to ask her to become his wife." (1 Samuel 25:39, NLT)

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